When it comes to dating and relationships I have the worst luck, it really is just one disaster after another, after a while they all become laughable. Growing up I always had it in my head that by 25 I would be married and have my first child, but coming up to 26 I can barely keep a relationship going longer than a couple months, or more recently 3 weeks, and it was the most recent guy I dated who had the idea that I write about my dating disasters, bet he didn't see the first one being about him though! I will tell you about him in a bit first, my family curse.
I can't quite remember who told me this story, think it was my grandmother. Years or even centuries ago a male ancestor of mine lusted and formed a relationship with a Gypsy girl, the girl fell pregnant and my ancestor left her to marry another woman. Heartbroken the young gypsy girl or her mother placed a cursed on my ancestor's descendants so that they would be unlucky in love. I know this sounds like a fairy tale and impossible as my grandparents have a lasting and successful marriage, as do both of my aunts and their husbands. Unfortunately the same cannot be said for my mother who is going through her own case of heart break at the moment. My mother has never been married and was a single mother to three children, she has never found her one and only. She's a strong woman and hope one day she finds someone.
This tale seems to be passed down to each generation, if i am lucky enough to have children in the future I certainly won't be passing it on to them as it's stuck in my head and do believe I maybe cursed when it come's to love.
So back to my frog.
I was on the verge of deleting my plenty of fish account as it is just full of time wasters and down right strange people when I received a simple "Hey" message, not the greatest conversation starter but the guy was attractive in his photo so i browsed and had a read of his profile, and from what I read he seemed just as fed up as me! so I replied and we dived straight into conversation, no awkward chit chat, we got along, we chatted for maybe 2 or 3 days before we arranged our first date. Our first phone call lasted near 3 hours, we couldn't believe where the time went and think is it possible to like someone before you've met them???!!!
4th of August, Date day, I wasn't particularly nervous until I had got on the train and noticed I had foundation and tooth paste down my top! Attractive not! All started going through my head then, he's going to think i'm a tramp, omg what if he thinks i'm fat....the ball was rolling and was getting bigger until I arrived at charing cross to meet him. We had arranged a day just walking through London and eventually grabbing lunch. From the moment we met we did not stop talking, we strolled for a good couple hours in the sun totally unaware our ankles were being torn to pieces! my make up was melting i was just not having much luck! luckily he didn't seem to mind and complimented me. Eventually we stopped at a Henry's where I was treated to lunch and prosecco, at this point my heart had been won, prosecco is a favourtie of mine though we shared so I wasn't under pressure to drink it all alone! To add to my stains and embarrassment I managed to drop burger down my top, i laughed with embarrassment and he laughed at my clumsiness, so it was all good!. Too finish the date off we lounged in Regents Park and shared our First Kiss.
*****i won't bore you with everything*****
Keeping it short and sweet, after he pushed for an "us" on that very first day, we had a great weekend together, we lunched, i met his friends, he met one of mine, we got drunk and had great sex. Then it kinda went down hill from there, I firmly understood he had mad plans prior to meeting me and i did not once expect him to drop any of his plans for me, but when you like someone you make the time to see them, you should be excited to spend time together, even if it was just a night together or meeting for an hour for lunch, but not him, he just didn't want to make the time and we never had an evening just the two of us together. This Saturday gone I finally thought we were just going to have a chill night together, he had hurt his leg so I was more then willing to look after him, so after saying see you soon on the phone, I had bought beer and tapped in at the train station to find a text sent 12 minutes after the call saying, i'm going to bed, i'm knackered, i know haven't spent time with you, sorry.
what did i do to deserve that level of rudeness and disrespect, i was not worth that extra phone call to save me tapping in to cancel directly. For me that was it, he clearly does not feel or care for me, why was I wasting my time and energy, he's not contacted me since, he is just another frog. It's taken a hangover and exhaustion to feel the hurt caused but the positive to these dating disasters is that each time i get stronger and i am better prepared to keep my head up and carry on. I have regrets and if I could go back and do things differently I would but whats done is done. I deleted my plenty of fish account and won't be going back as I've learnt the hard way it's a very murky pond with many different species of pond life.
But don't let me discourage you from online dating as everyone has their own experiences, I was introduced to plenty of fish by a friend who met her fiance on there! Unfortunately for me it was no prince and mainly ***** in tin foil.
Have you got a online dating story? comment below or email me just click on the contact link at the top of the page!